My Ex Watches My Stories Every Day (Here’s Exactly Why)

Relationships are not always smooth sailing. In some rough points, you may be hit with an awful breakup that leaves you grief-stricken. But, the post-breakup story is a completely different maze to crack through. It is this time when you may suddenly notice your ex going through your Instagram stories and jerk with mixed feelings of confusion, surprise, and sometimes excitement too. Are they still interested? Do they regret their actions? There are several such questions flooding your mind and you feel restless.

Don't rush into something because we have come up with the answers to your puzzled mind. The following article will bring in clarity and put you in a state of zen.

Here is the real picture 

Reasons why your ex watches your stories

There are multiple reasons you must get aware of when you catch your ex seeing your stories. The breakup has its effects as much as the relationship does. So, you must not forget to consider all the factors that come along with the rift and lead your ex to peep through your stories.

Get ready to throw light on them 

#1 They miss you

While we say they miss you, we may actually want to mean that they are missing the lovely days spent with you. Even if the split was mutual, it never takes away the memories of the past that are haunting them at every waking hour. You both had shared a phase of romantic exchange that might involve hundreds of priceless moments. With the breakup comes an unbearable void, an absence that they find nearly impossible to accept. 

Your relationship must have been filled with memories of cute cuddles, waking up to hear each other's voices, walking long ways holding hands, having hour-long conversations, and more such sweet things. They are missing these deeper parts of life recalling the time that is gone never to come back again. 

Breakup creates emotional damage and a scar painful to deal with. So in trying to put some relief and maybe a temporary piece of self-consolation, they glance at your stories to see you again and again and feel good for a little while. In this way, they might be trying to cope with the emptiness which is tearing them apart.

Again it might be a silent message they want you to have about how terribly they still miss your presence and the magic things you two have done in the past years.

#2 They are curious about your life

For the last few years, your ex has been an important part of your life. They have known every little rise and fall and tried to contribute to them. Now that you are no longer together, they cannot stay offhand to all the things happening in your life. They would be eager to get updates on your present movements. 

Being blocked from everywhere you used to be virtually connected to, they would never miss a single chance to snoop on your stories about your personal life right now. 

Taking a secret look at the stories you share is probably a sign that they are curious to know how badly the breakup has struck you or how much change it has brought to your life. Since you have drifted apart, it became a matter of curiosity to assess the impact of their absence in your life and how easily you are going on with everything without them, and whether it has made any big difference to you to carry on with life like before. 

It's perhaps the assurance they might be seeking through any of the insta stories which might prove that you too are sad about losing them. It would induce a sense of strange satisfaction if they ever notice marks of loss and pain from your appearance because that would in fact feed their ego.

#3 They want to patch up

This can be a genuine reason why your ex starts prying into the stories you put on the gram. If they happen to be the ones who, in the heat of the moment, decided to break up with you, and now regret their actions, it's nothing unusual for them to wish for reconciliation with you. 

They were angry and upset with you and afterward, their anger being pacified, they want you back like anything. But what pulls them back is their self-image and they are trying to throw signals to let you give in and make the first concrete move.

It is taken as the most convenient way to communicate their weakness and their desire to reconnect and revive the relationship by creeping into your stories. Everybody deserves a second chance, especially when we prioritize the relationship and realize that the other one is honestly sorry. And we ought to forgive and give it a fresh new start on finding our ex trying to reach us through viewing our stories.

You can also count on the possibility that they see your stories because they have never taken the breakup too seriously to come back and patch up, or they had the least idea about spending life without you when they turned away and broke up. This impossibility brings them to make repeated attempts on restoring the relationship now.

#4 They seek closure

In the current scenario, digital platforms have become an unavoidable part of our life. We share our regular rituals on Instagram and Facebook stories with an enthusiasm that is effortless. So, if your ex watches these stories, there might be a different story behind it. All you need to do is to dig a bit deeper.

If your breakup has left things that still feel unresolved or given rise to questions that are unanswered, it is a possibility that your ex is trying to get closure through these implied gestures. Your separation might not end the emotions they find lingering like unfinished stories into them. 

They need a resolution that would help them to move on. That is why they see your daily stories to find out something that could act as the missing link.

Breakup is fine if either of you is no more willing to stay in the relationship. But the reasons should be clearly stated or if there are some other compulsions, that too should be communicated without leaving a place for further qualms. And when you know there was this lack of explanation, you can be sure that your ex might feel the constant urge to reach a justification for the breakup and come out of the vagueness to stay happy with their future life. 

#5 They want to see you happy

You may be thrown for a loop to see your ex stalking you through your Instagram stories. But believe it or not, where there is smoke there must be fire, as they say. Since your insta stories could reflect what's going on with your life, these snippets may prove to be a way to see you happy and stay relieved. Yes, your ex could be one of those few people who would always wish the best for you, no matter what. 

People differ and so can your ex too. Breakup doesn't discard the feeling of respect you used to have during your relationship. Possibly to see your happy posts or stories that showcase you are going fine with your friends and near ones, they want to feel equally happy for you. 

There is no denying the fact that your ex doesn't always hold grudges against you. Relationships might not work out into lifelong commitment, yet that does not stop anyone from caring about you in a healthy way. Rather, it indicates that your ex is mature enough to deal with the breakup in a dignified way and denounce the kind of ill feeling one bears after a separation.

Your online stories of recent adventures, road trips, or going around with someone else might be something that comforts them and reassures an invisible bond of affection even after the breakup. In a way, it helps them to chuck out the feeling of guilt or self-loathing about dumping you.

#6 They haven't got over you

If you see that your ex is frequenting your Instagram stories, you should analyze them and may find that they still do feel strongly about you. You must not confuse the very feeling of love with staying in a relationship with the person you love. They could acknowledge the breakup as the apt decision to make for both of you, but even after you both have parted ways, the feeling might not die down. It may still be there as intensely as before, which is probably pushing them to visit your online stuff.

Relationships can be a great learning process that makes you accustomed to each other in a hundred ways. You develop things that turn into habits over the course of time. Loving each other too becomes a habit that cannot be shaken off quite easily. Breakups have nothing to do with the love that they feel for you, and it remains constant with the same flow of passion even if you chose different lives for yourselves.

Being on the rebound, they may not resist the temptation to see whatever you share on the insta stories, as that might be the only open door to reach you. They yield to it and go about attending to the updates you post online. As has been mentioned before, they barely manage to get your thoughts off their chest since they are deeply in love with you and want to get a sight of you whenever they can. With the emotions left over, they still crave one glimpse of the face they can't get enough of.

#7 They are jealous and insecure

One of the most common impulses that motivate your ex to stalk your online content can be their sense of insecurity. The romantic commitment you had, had always instilled a few notions in them like they can never be replaced by anyone else. But with the less-expected breakup, they have started feeling insecure. On top of that, they are more into putting a finger on your relationship status and are desperate to know if your present partner is better than them or not.

As soon as they see your stories with an unknown person, a stab of jealousy punches their heart and they become more curious to see the inside scoop. It gets hard for them to digest the raw truth that you have finally moved on with someone more deserving. 

They cannot turn their eyes off the snapshots you share in stories, as they try to find faults with your partner to defend their own lack of compatibility with you. They draw constant comparisons to boost their false sense of superiority, which in reality suggests their fragile self and flawed personality.

But, on the other hand, if your stories speak for your current status of singlehood, they instantly feel validated. Their inflated confidence in you drives them to sneak into your daily online data with the hope that you can never belong to anybody else.

#8 They want attention from you

Having been in a state where they used to have the control over you, this attention-seeker ex of yours maybe deliberately watches your stories to let you not forget them. It's their odious self that never gets happy to see your progress in life without them.

By taking a look at your stories they want you to do the same, i.e. to view their stories in return. This is a cunning ploy to push you in the wrong direction so that they would still be calling the shots and grabbing your eyeballs on themselves. That doesn't imply that they want to get back with you or they feel apologetic or ashamed of their previous misconduct, it's simply their way of tricking you into their net.

A small instance of viewing your stories can be intentional and made on purpose to get you hooked on your past. This is a psychological game that they might be playing with your vulnerable self that has hardly managed to overcome the breakup phase. Knowing this, they may nudge your wounds to stop you from ticking along fine with others.

There are some other sides to it too. If your ex has been cheating on you before, which led to the split, they might try again to manipulate you by acting innocent and trying to convince you that they repent the way they have wronged you and so they see your stories to communicate their remorse. To speak the truth, all they want is to take advantage of your innocence and trust and repeat the same wicked thing.

#9 They want to stay as a friend

Keeping a friendship after a breakup is easier said than done. As history shows us, lovers cannot be friends once they become partners. But there are also examples where people broke up and yet continue to be good friends without involving in a romantic commitment. This is possible if you had shared a pure bond of friendship before you fell in love with them. So your ex may be trying to ask you for the old spark of friendship by showing their habit of seeing your Instagram stories. 

If your romantic engagement ended on a decent note, revamping your old friendship is often harmless. There may be no foul intention from their end to try remaining in the friendship zone. It shows that they are comfortable staying friends with you and got over the remaining bruises of the breakup to get along well with their own life. Being unable to state it directly, they communicate by hitting your online stories.

On the flip side, if either of you is still on the mend and carries the love for the other with the same profound spirit, you'd better be off avoiding any sort of terms with them. Don't get roped in for initiating friendship as it may dig out the aching spots that have long been buried after a hard trial.

Some breakups are nasty, dark, and heartbreaking. If you have lived through an experience as draining as that, calling out for friendship with your ex is always a red flag. Don't tread the roads that you have wilfully abandoned for choosing a peaceful life. Move on and find the happiness that comes without a condition.

#10 They do it out of habit

The fast-paced present world is moving around the internet and needless to say digital platforms like Instagram have brought radical changes in our perspectives and lifestyle. We are more virtually engaged and affected than having an actual human connection in reality. Therefore, our online activities, most often, determine things that demand attention and importance. Seeing your ex's name on the top-viewers list on Instagram stories might create a surge of conflicting emotions in you. But did it ever cross your mind that seeing stories could be just another habitual act that they are yet to get rid of?

It could be a fact that while you were dating each other, they were into a habit of watching your stories and it has stayed with them as a remaining trace of their past routine. So, this is a mistake they make without a twisted intent. It really takes time to get into a new track of regularity once the familiar chain breaks off. Hence, this is no wonder if they stumble upon your Instagram stories unintentionally. Try to see it in a safe light until they try messaging you or making contact with you through other means.

It's a good sign, again, if they have learned to treat you as any other regular acquaintance and see your stories as they generally do to others who are added to their insta list of followers. In short, if they did not stop following you it could be because they are not bothered about your virtual presence and look at your stories as a spontaneous response.

How you should respond when your ex watches your stories?

It's no easy to deal with a breakup. And things get worse when one fine morning you see your ex's name as one of the people who watched your stories. It triggers a set of unknown feelings in you and you are at your wit's end about how to react to it. To come clean, you have to read the article below.

#1 Confront them outright

Your ex has been your past and there is no point dwelling on the past. So, if you made up your mind about moving on and want to stick to it, you need to state it forthright to your ex, if somehow they want to ruin your peace of mind. 

Their constant presence would get you stuck on your way and you must acknowledge that at the right time. Once you know that they can't go beyond this line, you have to come forward and confront them with an air of directness. Tell them that you feel absolutely nothing for them and want them to stay out of your digital circle as well. 

Now that you are trying to focus on your self-growth, this one stupid act might prove off the mark. So in no way you should indulge them or encourage their re-entry, which is thoroughly uncalled for. Be firm and clear with your words to keep them afar and make it clear that whatever has gone, has gone forever and most importantly they are wasting time barking up the wrong tree.

#2 Reach out to them if you want to patch up

If you still feel the urge to reconcile with your ex and are waiting for them to make the initial move, it's time you start following their stories back to give them a silent nod. There is nothing wrong with wanting to get back to your loved one. If both of you are ready to work hard on your relationship and make amends for your previous mistakes, it's worth giving a second chance to it. 

In this context, we must remember that relationships are delicate and both of you need to take care of it with an equal amount of dedication, honesty, and willingness to grow together. One small blunder and you may lose it forever. Therefore, if you truly feel like staying together again, you need to talk to each other and make sure the communication channel is always open and each of you gets over your own niggles for the sake of your relationship at large. 

Breakups can be an eye-opener to see through your faults and bring changes to the way you look at your mutual perspectives. However, once you regain the old vibe you are free to enjoy it and embrace your ex to start afresh.

#3 Ignore it if you can

Ignoring is the best way to answer any unsolicited intrusion from your ex's side. They might be trying hard to get your attention or trick your soft spot into their favor, but it's your choice to pay no heed to it and leave it unattended every time they try sneaking into your virtual data.

Rejection hurts, but what hurts most is the dismissal, that too coming from the one who used to adore them once. When you dismiss their presence, it would hit them the worst way. You can see it as a powerful defense armor that protects your self-composure from getting shaken.

You should stay calm and strong in the face of momentary temptation to give in because this could be the turning point that can either befall you or lift you to a new height of self-discovery. Don't go for anything that might cost your dignity and harmony. 

To ignore your ex's gestures could be as hard as hell, but try to visualize the consequences it may bring in the long run. Save your heart, your mind, and your life by not choosing the wrong one. A silent removal, in this case, would be more than enough to show their status in your life.

#4 Let go of the past

Your relationship with your ex has come to an end and that's because there must be something bigger on priority than the relationship itself. This is the truth and the sooner you accept it the lesser is the pain. Holding onto your past would gain you nothing constructive. Life must go on and you need to keep up with the pace. Your past would only drag you down which you must not approve of for the sake of your emotional well-being.

Pulling yourself away from the memories you once cherished is a tough battle you have to fight every second. But, any act of foolishness toward your ex's manipulation might be more distressing. You cannot deny the fact you have broken up with your ex for a valid reason. Take a good lesson from the past and let the sand slip through your fingers. 

It's high time you know your own worth and back away. Change the privacy settings of your social media profiles or simply block them to dissociate yourself from anything related to your ex.

Uncover your stronger self as life does not always give you the privilege to refocus on its brighter sides. Wipe out everything that is dark and find out the hidden flame to shine on. Remind yourself of every reason why you should distance yourself from your ex even if they are trying to reconnect.

#5 Seek support from your friends

We always have a friend circle whom we trust and confide in. In a crisis like this when your ex is trying to press a restart button, you need to knock on your friends who might be able to stay neutral and share their unbiased suggestions. 

Your friends might be the ones who saw you going through this whole journey of breakup and sometimes they know you better than yourself. Being your well-wishers they can help you with advice you may find invaluable.

Our mind is often blinded by emotions and a lack of rationality when it comes to deciding about our loved ones. But our friends can be practical and realistic in judging such situations and support us, especially if it concerns our happiness. Talk to them and share your dilemma, your confusion. They might play the best roles in finding direction for you. Moreover, they will never find an excuse to leave your hand when you need them the most.

#6 Communicate in a civil way

Your ex's inquisitiveness in your personal life might get on your nerves if it becomes a daily story. Under such circumstances an open communication may find clarity. Ponder the gravity of the situation, and if you still find it to be the only way, do it modestly. Approach them asking the reason. Settle on boundaries that cannot be crossed.

Trust your gut feeling and measure the limit you can not go beyond. Tell them you have moved on and you have no bitterness against them. Find your own voice to speak for yourself so that by no means you have to lose your sanity.

This one brief conversation with your ex may help you find solace and put an end to this daily drama. But remember one thing, don't let your nerves get weakened in the end. Invest your time and emotions in people who deserve and reciprocate them.

#7 Engage in activities you love

You have come out of the toxicity that was sucking your soul up for a long while. Now is the best time to pour in your efforts into things that keep you busy and content.

Don't sit back idle, seize the opportunities to thrive. Brush aside all the negativity and soak in the immense possibilities waiting for you. Cultivate your passions that have been kept out of sight so far. Break the inertia and unlock your hidden potential and you will get no time to brood or pay attention to anything as petty and worthless as your ex. 

Let them hunt for you in useless searches since it fits them right. You should find time for self-care and engage in activities that you always felt passionate about. Practice meaningful habits to take control of your mind and body, because after all it's your life and you should be the only one ruling the roost.

Pro tips

Let's get some quick tips to remember while responding to your ex watching your stories 

• Your happiness and your peace of mind always come first. So don't think about changing the course of your thoughts based on your ex's reaction. Keep sharing content that makes you happy, regardless of their frequent views.
• Make the most of your stories by showing them the uplifting images, success, and gala moments of your life and how great you feel with your close ones.
• Block their visibility or unfollow them if you ever find their presence upsetting your emotional hold over things.
• Don't encourage anything from your ex that distracts you from your goal. Get involved in the activities of your interest and focus on self-care. 
• Have your own space and take a temporary break from the virtual world if that affects your mental health.
• Engage in an open communication to set and state clear boundaries to your ex.