When a Guy Apologizes for Being Busy (9 Possible Reasons)

You want your lover to be around you. When you have just started dating, there is an inexcusable longing for your partner that drives you crazy and makes you go head over heels. When you have been together for a while, there might be this constant need for reassurance that your love for him will be materialized into something solid in the years to come. 

However, the absenteeism of your lover or a potential date, either over text or call, has disheartening tendencies. You seem to shake your notions and regards of him, as a result, you tend to overthink. Sometimes the effect is so tenacious that it crumbles you down and turns you skeptical. You are not being able to separate black and white because you are not certain about the guy’s feelings. 

Only one thing remains constant in this scenario: his apology. Now this puts you in a tricky situation for you don’t know if the apologies are genuine or tailor-made. To help you understand this, I bring you this post. I shall be discussing here the possible reasons why a guy apologizes for keeping busy and how can you cope with it. 

To know more, continue reading below.

Reasons why a guy apologizes for being busy 

The guy is sorry for not being available. If you handle your things very well and manage your time in such a way that you have never been too busy for the guy, it will render him a guilty conscience. By apologizing to you, he is showing that he is in a helpless situation. 

However, that might not be all. Read below to find out the more extensive and elaborate reasons why a guy might apologize for being busy and how that affects your relationship. 

#1 He doesn’t want to lose you 

While something is keeping the guy engaged, it doesn’t mean that he wants to lose the opportunity to take you out, make you feel special, or be with you. If his apology has warmth, if he is apologizing by sending you flowers, if his apology is not limited merely to a text for the sake of convention, if the apology for being busy does not arrive without a present on a special day such as your birthday or graduation then it is genuine. 

Some things are not negotiable. Among those things are the availability of a certain person on a certain day. If that guy holds no special position in your life but apologizes to you anyway, it suggests that he wants to make it special for you. There are times when you would notice that a random guy is walking the extra mile to please you, to bring himself into your inner circle, in this case, his apology will be grand. 

It will be more like a display meant to please the sense of sight, whereas, you will find that your boyfriend might either not apologize or doesn’t do it quite significantly. Does that mean that he doesn’t love you, or that his manners aren’t gentlemanly enough? No, it doesn’t. It means that he trusts you with your understanding and believes that you know how much he loves you. 

A powerful reiteration is not needed especially on days when he is the most occupied. Learn to distinguish between the people who have recently started taking an interest in you and want to use every opportunity to secure your attention and those who already think the world of you.

#2 He is scared of upsetting you 

If the position you hold in the guy’s life has allotted you an upper hand to do him favors, bring him luck, and benefit him, he would do everything in his care to make you feel special. He might be scared of upsetting you. This also happens when you have never disappointed him in life. You might be in a time of need, feeling low, or perhaps sick, but he is not around. 

This would pertain to anyone’s guilty conscience. It is advisable to not be too harsh in your conduct when the apology is already put forward beforehand from his side. However, if the behavior is too recurrent, it is also advisable to take the hint and step back. 

#3 He has taken you for granted 

Perhaps the guy has found you too accommodative and that has stolen him of that yearning to court you. Guys like challenges but when they discover that you are easy to find, and say, you would have gone on a date with anyone, that you are desperate, that you don’t foresee a set of qualities when checking out a person, or that if you are already head-over-heels obsessed with him, he will take you lightly. 

In such a case, the apology would be made only for the sake of it. It would hold no substance. In such cases, notice the way he looks at you if and when he meets you, if he looks ligers on you, he is not distracted by an outside force, he is appealing to you and cares to make you feel comfortable, warm and cozy, he might be worthy of attention. If not, let the case rest.

#4 He plans on proposing to you 

Perhaps the guy is planning to propose to you but fears that you will leave him or put him down because of his hectic schedule. The guy doesn’t want to put himself in a situation where he would have to choose between his career and you. He has made his priorities clearer. Moreover, if you would like him to subside his needs, his profession or choose you over his dream rather than making you a part of it, he might not appreciate it as much. 

It is important here to consider your feelings towards him. If you feel passionately for him, you will refrain from charging him with your rebukes if and when he is not available. Instead, treat him tenderly by showing him the love he didn’t know exist. Set a benchmark of the treatment that someone secures from you even if they are in hindsight. It would show that getting loved by you is a luxury.

#5 He is not proud of his engagements 

Had the guy been doing something of an excellent nature, he wouldn’t have apologized for staying engrossed in that work; he would have told you proudly about it in the hope that by default, you would understand it. But perhaps he is just a layman doing some modest work and living a mediocre life where the struggle is more laborious than it is intellectual. Hence, he might take some time in gathering the courage to reveal his reality to you. 

If you come from a well-bred family, you haven’t witnessed any suffering, you hold a good position in a firm, and the guy might even be jealous of your luck and the fortune that it brings. Such people are toxic. If ever in his running mark, he unveils his jealousy, it is strongly recommended to not engage yourself with this guy. He might bring you trouble.

#6 He loves you 

If he regards you as a special sight, it might break him to stay busy rather than spend time with you. Perhaps he has been on the lookout for an occasion or a good time when he could set about to show his affection in action rather than in words. He is afraid of rejection and hence, he would not take a chance by doing something that gives you the privilege to reject him. 

Hence, wait along a little longer than you had thought of, and if ere the waiting window closes, he can show you his love without uttering the words, take yourself to be among the luckiest damsels in the world.

#7 He is making excuses 

Perhaps the note of apology is only a means of making excuses to not see you or spend time with you without breaking your heart. This happens when the guy is a casanova and you have been relentless in your pursuit of him. 

Take a break and see if he comes after you. If he doesn’t, you were trying to pursue him blindly.  You will be happier with someone who loves you rather than with someone whose desire for you is hollow. Close your eyes and think of the last 5 times that you have either occasioned to meet him or the meeting has been subdued owing to his excuses. The picture will be clear to you. To know more, click on the link below.

Related Read: He Doesn’t Call Me Anymore (Reasons + Ways to Respond)

#8 He is seeing someone else 

If the guy is hanging out with someone else, it is obvious that he will apologize to you. However, the apology is more for being already taken than for being busy. It might be earnest but it is futile to you. Drop him hints that you would appreciate it more if he would tell you the reason for his negligence or behind his absence rather than weaving a thread of lies. 

If he has other commitments, tell him that you would understand. It won’t make you vulnerable. And just because you might have spent some good time together doesn’t mean that you need to sustain it. The best favor he can do is, to be honest with you. If he reacts all hurt and miserable, help him see from your point of view.

#9 He had a good time with you 

Perhaps the guy is more inclined in moving towards a friends-with-benefit equation. He had a great time with you but getting committed is not his cup of tea. Notice the time he conveys his regard and the places where he suggests meeting you. If he likes to take you to movies or hotels rather than hanging out in clubs by introducing you to his friends, his intentions are either perverse or merely physical. 

You must figure out what is the equation that you are looking for. If it won’t please you much and you are greedy for love rather than toying around with a playdate, perhaps you will have a better time with someone who has made up his mind to make it meaningful with you. Be legitimate in purpose. Don’t let guys fling about and crumble with your emotions.

What to do when a guy apologizes for keeping busy?

Be more accommodating to understand his true intentions toward you. If he is apologizing, he prices you. Bearing this in mind, move forward to see what you can make out of this equation. 

To know more, continue reading below. 

#1 Give him time 

When someone apologizes for being busy, give them time. Perhaps the guy is genuinely caught up with something. Try to be more accommodating and less nagging. The guy will appreciate it. Patience is important for the well-being of a relationship. If you plan to develop one with him, it is better to imbibe such qualities.

#2 Show him the rewards 

Based on your true intentions, let the guy see how he will profit if he decides to be more enthusiastic about you. Show him the rewards of dating you. Cherish his presence. Listen to him when he talks. Appreciate his efforts and be an understanding friend. These small qualities go a long way toward the growth and development of a relationship.

#3 Stay busy too 

If the guy has been persistently unavailable, has turned down your requests, and then one day calls you randomly to request your company, make him sweat for your time. Don’t be easily available round the clock to make the chase easy. You should not function according to his convenience. 

When you keep yourself busy, your mind will not mind you with unsettled questions. Your energy will be more focused on areas that are upward moving. The graphs are not stagnant or leading to a downfall. It will enable you to make better decisions in life. When you give your time importance, people will start giving you importance.

#4 State your expectations 

If the guy is hinting towards dating you or showing any illicit interest in you, it is wise to state your expectations and the ground rules along with it so that he knows the dealbreakers. It should be put ruthlessly, and it shouldn’t be unrealistic in approach. When your ground rules are realistic, it will be an encouraging factor for him and will help both of you to play the long shot.

#5 Express your feelings 

Do away with sending mixed signals and be singular in your purpose. When you give clarity, you will get clarity. Communication should be kept open both ways. If you feel that the guy might be waiting for your signal or for you to break the ice and reveal your feelings, do it. Break the stereotype of idealizing all the romantic roles to be played by the guy and coy roles to be played by the girls. If you are in for an interesting ride, make it interesting yourself.

#6 Don’t make it all about him 

Take concrete steps to work towards self-affirmation. Your life should never revolve around a single guy. It should be about you. When the driving force of your life is you, things are easy to tackle. The situations don’t get overwhelming. You have the control button in your hand. 

The easiest way of doing it is to be in the present and give your best. 

When a guy apologizes to you, forgive him. Keep it to that. You don’t need to think of the future or recollect the past. Don't let your mind sway unnecessarily. Had he asked you to plan for the future or chart out ways in which both of you would have been in a better disposition to take out time for each other then it would have been better. However, since no such suggestion has come forth, don’t hassle yourself in this regard. Life will be easy that way.

Tips 

• Learning to forgive for forgiveness has the power to empower you. The moment you forgive a person for their shortcomings and errors, you free yourself from their bondage. Your mind won’t hammer you as to your equation with them. You will be in a better condition to take things as and when they come. 
• When someone apologizes to you, it means that they care for you. There is no more beautiful feeling than this. Savor it. Hold their hands, look them in the eyes, and tell them how they make you feel. Make their interest feel protected, and make them feel cared for.
• Learn your feelings first before you attempt to solve the maze of the other. Understanding the importance of the guy in your life before jumping to know how he feels about you or why he might be apologizing to you is essential. Unless your feelings for him are cleared and acknowledged, you will not be able to draw the line as and when required.