We Haven’t Talked in a Week After the Fight (Is It Normal?)
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They say, never go to bed without resolving a fight. Unfortunately, in your case, the fight has lasted for quite some days. You two have slept over a fight for a week. The damage has been done. You guys have unresolved issues to address and that should be done as a priority if you value your relationship.
Procrastination won’t do any good in this situation. No contact for a week might add more problems to your life. Both of you need to deal with this fiasco effectively. Things need to be handled in a mature way. The conversation is key here. Through this blog post, I will help you find out the reasons behind this sticky situation you are in, and suitable solutions to get out of it. Read on.
Reasons why you have not talked to your partner in a week after the fight
A no-contact situation is common after fights in romantic relationships. Fights often leave you too exhausted to function properly. It is good to spend some time away from each other. But not talking to your partner for a week is not the best way to deal with a fight. Not being able to face each other can make reconciliation a bit difficult. In worst-case scenarios, it can even lead to a breakup.
A couple can have many reasons to get involved in a bad fight. Fights that last for days are definitely serious and one needs to be careful when they are dealing with such a delicate situation. Not talking o your partner for a week is worrisome. You will have to address the problem as a priority. But for that, you need to find the right reason.
Let’s get to the root of the problem. Scroll down for more.
#1 You guys are not being able to face each other
It must have been a nasty fight. It was so bad that you guys are not being able to face each other now. It is true that you two like each other (or are probably in love) but that is not enough to get rid of the uncomfortable situation. You will have to accept the fact that fights happen and they are far from pleasant.
Not being able to face each other is a situation that occurs from a fight that involves an embarrassing amount of yelling and badmouthing. You two (or any one of you two) must have said some pretty nasty stuff to each other in several heat-of-the-moment situations. You two must have used harsh words and hurled verbal abuses at each other.
Getting a bit too personal during a verbal spat can also lead to a situation where a couple might feel uncomfortable about facing each other. Personal attacks often include confidential information which was supposed to be secret. Personal information often carries a lot of vulnerability and that is why it is shared with people who are trustworthy. Bringing that out in public as a form of revenge or using it to hurt one another during a fight is an extremely immature and irresponsible thing to do.
Such behavior can make one feel embarrassed once the fight is over. You two are probably thinking about the futility of your foolish actions. The embarrassment is stopping you from facing each other. Things you two have done during the fight are pretty unforgettable and it only needs a mature mind to put all of that in the past and move on with the relationship towards a more positive future.
#2 You guys are still mad at each other
Well, that is the most feasible option in this scenario. You two have not talked in a week after the fight because you guys are still mad at each other. Fighting is common in relationships, but let’s accept that fighting with your partner is not great for your relationship. A small fight can still be harmless. However, fights that last for weeks or even a couple of days can be harmful.
Not talking to each other is making you guys angrier. You think you are right while your partner thinks they are. It is all about perspectives. You want your partner to start talking first and they want you to be the first one to break the silence. In this situation, breaking the ice is the most difficult and the easiest task at the same time. There is a sheer lack of initiative in both of you and that is clearly because you two are mad at each other.
Being mad at each other for days can have several negative effects on your life as well as on the lives of people around you. This foul mood could make you cranky and that can meddle in your familial relationships. Bad moods lead to involuntary blurting out of words that can offend people irreparably.
You have pent-up feelings as a result of not talking to your partner for a week after a fight. That only means you will vent out to people who have nothing to do with the situation. You might end up yelling at your parents for no reason. You might even say a few rude words to the friend who is looking out for you. Similarly, your partner will also go through similar situations in the aftermath of the fight.
#3 You guys think you are still mad at each other
Both of you think you are still mad at each other. This is possible because you two have not spoken to each other in the past seven days. The fight was an obvious reason for this no-contact situation. But now the situation has festered to a great extent. The fact that both of you think that you are mad at each other is stopping you from taking the first step.
Not taking a step forward to resolve the issue will push this relationship further toward an inevitable breakup. It is normal to think that your partner is mad at you after a fight (especially when you have not talked to each other in a week). Your partner thinks that they were too harsh towards you during the fight. They are thinking about all the bad words they have used and the personal attacks they should not have done. You are thinking in a similar way and the end result is the situation you are in.
Both of you are thinking, “I should not have said that. I could have been less rude to the person I love. They must be so mad at me.” The possible truth is: both of you are suffering from delusion. You are making things up in your head and that is stopping you from talking to each other and rectifying the situation. Conversations can stop wars and that is what you guys desperately need right now.
#4 Your partner is losing interest in you
You and your partner have not talked to each other in a week after the fight because they are losing interest in you. The fight occurred because of your differences. A lot of differences and a lot less in common can ruin relationships. The fight may have made your partner rethink the relationship situation. They are thinking if this is worth fighting for.
The fact that you are here looking for answers in this blog post proves that you are somewhat interested in them. You are willing to look for options and that is a positive thing. However, without your partner being interested in you, all of that effort goes to waste. A relationship can't be one-sided. The way things are going you are most likely to be the only person remaining in this relationship in the near future.
Not talking to you for a week has made your partner think that they can live without you. They have not missed you once in these seven days. They have analyzed the situation based on how many days they can stay without you. They think it is directly proportional to their romantic feelings for you. I am sorry to speculate that what you had with your partner was not love. Now, the question is: Have you missed them? I know the answer. You have missed your partner and that is why you are looking for solutions to this problem.
However, it is not all bleak. You can still harbor hope. We are speculating that your partner may be losing interest in you based on their behavior so far. They may not have talked to you in a week because they are really upset. It can also be that they have just started rethinking this relationship and you still have time to reconcile. You know your partner better than anyone. You will have the best instinct in this case.
#5 You guys are too rigid to deal with the issue
Both of you are at fault here. You two are too rigid to deal with the problem. You fought, stopped talking and now none of you are ready to make the first move. It is normal for you to think that your point of view is the only right thing. If you start thinking rationally you might find the other point of view quite legitimate.
Being too rigid to deal with the issue will only worsen the situation. You guys are too proud to talk it out. The fight could have been resolved in a day but this mindless ego fight has stretched it to the edge. This is a classic example of being immature in a relationship. This is exactly what Ross and Rachel did after their epic fight in Friends. It was a dire situation but if it was handled with the maturity it required, there would have been no confusion and we would get to see their on-and-off relationship.
Ego clash is normal in a relationship. However, romantic partners should never let it overpower their judgment. Making the right decision at the right time is essential for a relationship to survive. Do you remember what Monica said in F.R.I.E.N.D.S about an adult relationship? When after a brief yet serious fight, Chandler asked if it was over Monica said that these little things happen in a real relationship. These are the things that make it strong.
Being rigid about fights often happens at the beginning of a relationship. People are new to it and often do not know how to react to a difference in opinion. Fights last for days and weeks. However, if you continue to be in this relationship, things might get better with time. Things will fall in line once you start knowing each other better.
#6 You guys think the relationship is not worth saving
You two have already given up (or at least one of you has done that). A fight does not have to be the end of your relationship. A relationship needs a bit of effort to sustain, especially when it goes through a rough patch. The fight indicates that your relationship has hit that rough patch. Not talking to each other for a week won't solve anything.
You guys think the relationship is not worth saving because you fail to see the good things in it. Both of you are pessimists who only focus on the negative aspects of the relationship. Thoughts like this often attract fights and no-contact situations. Both of you fixate on things that can go wrong. You two are extremely conscious about your moves.
Being too conscious in a relationship does not let you be your true self. Not being true to yourself and to your partner brings unnecessary stress into your relationship. Both of you start acting like the most refined versions of yourselves. Regency-era behavior like that can make you suppress feelings and emotions resulting in you turning into a cranky human being (and as we all know, crankiness can cause nasty fights).
Suppressing or hiding your emotions from your partner can occur when they are judgemental. If you both do that then (unfortunately) both of you are judgemental. You are scared of the snide remarks from your partner. These remarks can be about the way you look dress or talk or even about your educational qualification. They can be extremely insensitive. Being scared of your partner is not healthy when you are in a relationship.
When fights occur in such scenarios, it often magnifies exponentially and turns ugly. You start blaming each other for all the misfortunes. The suppressed emotions uncover themselves and before you realize it, you have already said a hundred regrettable words to the person you like. That is the moment when most people start questioning the relationship thinking if it is worth the trouble. Check if this is happening to you too.
#7 Your partner is receiving ill advice from someone
The fight happened because of you two but it is continuing because of someone else. Some other person is trying to use the spat to cause problems in your relationship. You have not heard from your partner in seven days after the fight because they are listening to the bad advice of someone who is trying to cause harm to your relationship.
No advice is way better than bad advice. The person who is trying to manipulate your partner with interesting words knows that your relationship is standing on shaky ground, especially after the fight. While on the one hand, the fight brings you sadness, on the other hand, it brings hope for the scheming person. They are using your fight for an ulterior motif. Your partner fails to see that.
This person may or may not be close to your partner. There is a chance that this person harbors romantic feelings for your partner. They can also do this simply because they do not like you. They just do not want your partner to be in a relationship with you. They may have been the reason behind your fight.
The fact that your partner is not talking to you for a week proves that the manipulator is successful in their evil venture. The bad advice has done its job to create distance between you and your partner. I will not be amazed if they call for a breakup now.
#8 Your partner holds you responsible for the fight
You and your partner have not talked to each other in a week after the fight because they hold you responsible for it. They think you caused the fight. In relationships, this is more common than you think. People find it easy to put the blame on others, especially in situations where both are to be blamed.
Your partner has failed to find faults within themselves. They think they are the best. This shows your partner is a bit narcissistic. They like putting themselves on a pedestal. They probably think of you as a subordinate in this relationship. Romantic partners are supposed to be equal. It is a red flag if your partner puts you beneath them.
The fact that you are here looking for solutions to this problem proves that you are open to positive conversation and that shows how mature you are about this issue. Your partner likes to stew in a problem while you put all the necessary efforts to deal with it.
Blaming someone for a certain misfortune is easy. It is, even more, easier to not do anything about it. When a fight occurs in a relationship, both people are equally responsible if both of them take part in it actively. Both of you have regrettable things to each other. Why should you be the only one to look for a solution? Why would you take the sole responsibility?
Things to do when you and your partner have not talked in a week after the fight
The fight was a nasty one. Dealing with such a fight needs a lot of effort. But mostly, it needs the right intention. In this case, one needs to hold on to hope. Hoping that things will be all right will help you guys deal with the fight in a positive manner.
We have curated a list of suitable ways for you to deal with the week-long fight. Read on.
#1 Face the issue together
Not facing the issue and by extension not facing each other can bring the relationship to an edge. Of course, you do not want that if you are serious about this relationship. I know it is difficult to face each other after the nasty fight you had but both of you will have to put that in the past and move on.
Try to forget about all the embarrassing things you have said to each other. Forget the insults you have hurled at them. If you want this relationship to survive you will have to be positive and keep the embarrassment at bay. What I am asking you to do is difficult but it is one of the most effective solutions.
Facing each other after not talking for a week will be like ripping off a band-aid from a fresh wound. It will be like facing your worst fear. The comparison is legit because you are actually scared of facing your partner. Talking to each other a week after the fight might make you fight again as you two will probably talk about the same old issues that once made you fight so badly.
The real struggle would be to stay calm. Even if a fight breaks out, try not to escalate it with instigating words and gestures. Do whatever you can to keep things contained as this time it may hurt your relationship irreparably.
#2 Drop a text or call your partner
Let go of your ego for once and be the icebreaker this time. You can simply drop a text or call your partner to know what they are up to. I know, talking to them a week after a fight will be awkward, but this is the bare minimum.
As we have discussed earlier, your partner is not talking to you. Texting or calling them would show that you are still interested. That might do the trick to soften their heart. A fight is reason enough for the no-contact situation. Someone should at least try to break the silence before things turn sour between you two.
If you have decided to go forward with texting, here are a few ways to strike up a conversation:
- “Hey. Sorry for yelling at you the other day. How are you doing?”
- “We need to talk.”
- “Silence won’t do us any good. We have not talked to each other in a week. This is not normal.”
- “I am sorry for what happened the other day. We should talk things out.”
- “Hey. I know you are mad at me, but we should at least try to resolve the issue.”
Both of you were responsible for the fight. It is you who wants to resolve things. An apology would go a long way in this case. Saying sorry in a text might make your partner feel guilty for not talking to you for a week after the fight. They too will apologize if they are a sensible person.
#3 Visit your partner
There is no need to call them or drop a text when you can pay them a visit. Showing up at their door could be a grand gesture. A knock on the door after a fight is a very Hollywood thing. This trick will work especially if your partner loves a bit of drama. Gestures like this often depict more than words.
Your partner is mad at you. They might even be sad. Fights often induce ego clashes (as we have discussed earlier), which stop a person from expressing their true feelings. Your partner has not approached you first because of ego issues, but they will melt the moment you approach them.
The only important thing that you need to do in this case is to shed your vanity. Show up at their door and surprise them. You can bring something that they like with you, but remember not to be too extravagant. Not everyone is as childlike as Amy from The Big Bang Theory. She jumped up with joy when Sheldon gifted her a tiara (an expensive one) after their fight. If you try to give your partner an expensive gift, they might think you are trying to buy them. Trust me, that is not what you want. Keep it simple and humble when you decide to show up at their door unannounced.
#4 Try to be the mature one in the relationship
Fights are common in relationships, and so is the situation you are in right now. The fact that you are trying to look for solutions to your problem proves that you are willing to put in some effort. What about your partner? Are they doing anything to solve this problem? You (of all people) would have known if they actually tried to do something to make things right.
They are rigid. They will probably never budge. They think of this fight as a war and talking to you would paint them as a loser. That is definitely not the right way to deal with a relationship. The aftermath of a fight is not a competition, but they fail to understand that. You are required to be the bigger person in this scenario.
You can try to be the mature one in this relationship. Take the first step to resolve things between you two. For that, you will have to take a step back. Think about it. Are you okay with apologizing first or being the first one to break the awkward silence after the fight? Being okay with this will prove that you are a mature person, and this in turn will give you an upper hand in this relationship.
However, you can save a relationship only when it wants to be saved. Ask yourself: “Do I really need to be in this relationship?” and do not move forward with the plan if you come up with “no” as an answer.
There is more to think about. Your partner has not contacted you all this while. You are going to be the first one to do that in a week after the fight. They could have been the first ones to call or even drop a text. This shows that their ego is bigger than yours. They have already prioritized their anger. Do you want to stay in a relationship with a person like this? Think about it and do not let your emotions cloud your judgment.
#5 Check their social media activity
You can check their social media activity to find out what they are up to. Not being able to talk to your partner can be stressful when you are in a romantic relationship. It can be stressful for them as well. If they are active on social media, their online activity will reflect the distress they are going through. Look for sad posts and stories on all of their social media platforms.
Their social media activity will also let you know if they are missing you or not. Two things can happen if they miss you:
- They will make sad posts and put up sad stories. They will share sad posts made by other people.
- You will see no social media activity at all. That will show that they are too sad to use social media.
They will continue with their usual social media activities if they are not missing you at all. This could mean three things:
- They do not like you anymore. They are losing (or have lost) interest in you.
- They know you will be there for them no matter what. This is only applicable when you two have been in a relationship for a long time. You guys have that kind of understanding.
- They have taken you for granted.
Make your decision based on what you see on their social media. In this case, go with the facts. Go with what your head says. Following your heart might hurt you unexpectedly.
#6 Ask a common friend to check on them
You guys are going through a no-contact situation, but that does not necessarily mean you have stopped caring for them. If you feel worried about your partner’s well-being, ask a common friend to check in on them. However, remember not to use the friend as a postman between you two (otherwise this will be the last time you receive a favor from this friend).
You can talk to your partner’s friends as well for more information. They will definitely know something about what is going on in their mind. It is better to let a friend check on them first before you make a move. Ask them to be discreet. Your partner should not know that you have employed one of your friends to check on them.
Ask the friend to collect information about their mood. You will have to act accordingly if you want to resolve things between you two. Asking a friend to check on your partner will also help you decide if you want to be in this relationship or not. Check if they have moved on. There is no need to coax them into staying in this relationship if they do not want to do that.
#7 Break up if you think this relationship is not worth saving
You can break up with your partner if you think this relationship is not worth saving. Not talking to each other for a week following a fight is common, but not caring about one’s partner is not. You can’t let them take you for granted. Do not trade your self-respect for a questionable relationship.
Breaking up is not as easy as it sounds. It takes a toll on your mental health. So, be careful when you make such a decision. Instead of being impulsive and emotional, make an informed decision. Make sure that you do not have regrets after the breakup. It is always best to step out of a dysfunctional relationship.
Messing with your mental health for a person who does not care is not acceptable. Value yourself and the people who actually care for you. The partner you are so worried about has not even tried to contact you once after the fight. You are the only one who is trying to mend this relationship.
Tips and life hacks
A few points to be noted:
- Do not trade your dignity for anything. If your partner continues to be rude to you, give them a taste of their own medicine and stop trying to contact them. They will come back to you if they realize their mistake.
- A serious fight can go on for long. Not talking to each other in a week after the fight is normal. However, turning this issue into a war is not.
- The conversation is the key here. Talk to your partner and sort things out. No one can do this for you guys. You two will have to face each other sooner or later.
- Break up if this is too much to handle. Not everyone is equipped to deal with too much drama.
- Try to have patience. Fighting about the same issues, again and again, will only make things worse. Give your relationship some time to heal.
- Check if your partner has already moved on. This is necessary because you do not want to wait for someone who is no longer interested in you.